"Yes hello Felicia, ini Aboy."
"Oh yes Aboy? what is it?"
"Ini pasal abang Annoy..he's at the hospital..he fell off a building during routine checking at the working site, kalau boleh datang sekarang ok"...
----------------------------------------**********---------------------------------------
There was a long..deep silence..
He was a man of joy. He ambitiously aimed high for almost everything and would work hard to achieve them. He was a man with love. He was a man with care. But he left me without saying a word. He left me to handle myself alone in the urban city of KL. He left me to deal with my own feelings. And he left me, when i love him so much.
I never said it to anyone, but i knew you were acting weird a week before the accident. U were no KL person during weekend, nor were u a driving person outside town. But that Saturday, You woke me up saying "Pearl, let's go to Cameron Highland, i'll get mum to be ready as well"..i was rather "huh?" kind of state but i got up still. Off we went there and really enjoyed our time although i had a rough journey vomiting due to the road condition.
Came final exams. You sent me back to Cyberjaya and promised to meet again coming Saturday after my papers. You gave me a peck and good luck wishes for exams. "take care sayang" were your words.
That Saturday never came for you and me. I sat blankly for 7 papers, weeping silently answering exam questions thinking about you. I failed a paper, dragging my CGPA from 3.67 tremendously down to 2.79. I never regretted it though, cause it was worth it. For all the time i spent with you by your side..not coming without saying hi sayang and not leaving without saying sleep tight, it was all worth it. Dont worry, i got my CGPA back.
I never told anyone either how i dreamt of you waking up and said hi to me. I never told anyone how that dream freaked me out sebab i dreamt it during Subuh time and i believed it is never a good news. I got so shocked i woke up with my head lifted up and eyes wide open. I was grasping for air. Until now, i can still remember vividly, crystal clear the dialogues and the flow of the dream.
*****
It is exactly 2 years today.. 31st May marks the day you left us to be with God. You were cruel to me eventhough i begged you to wake up from your coma. You never did.
The healing process took longer than i anticipated. But i am ok now..which is why i'm letting you know, that i've met someone. Someone who made me fall in love again like the way i had with you before. I hope you wont mind, and please do not think of me betraying your love. I'm not..I just need to move on and i need to let you go. You have to help me with that..You'd want to see me happy right?
With all that said, dear Cheng Jing Liang, thank you for showering me with your endless tender loving care for all the time we've had each other before. I wish you peace and my love will always be there for you, eternity.
14 comments:
Aw. This is heartbreaking. I don't know how you can be so strong. I guess they all come in small packages eh. At least he left you with pleasant memories. And I'm sure he hopes for the best for you here. There there. Mari group hug.
sometimes u think your not strong enough.. but from our eyes, u are strong. People are dead when they are forgotten.A wonderful guy like him is really lucky to have someone like you to remember him...
sorry i cried. you should consider writing a novel. i do not know how you did it but i think i was there at that moment for a while. when i did come into my senses, my cheeks already wet with my tears =p
God Bless Everybody!!
yg pegi tetap pegi..jika dikenang makin sukar dilupakan...
xsempat tulis full name...muahaha..
Pourpres, Yasser, Kambengjantan, Tahik Kubar : Thank you all..
it's actually KambengJantan, i don't know how in the world only pourpres got it right. Appeared as kambengjantan everywhere though. Here' an award for you!! You deserved it!! =)
http://img301.imageshack.us/my.php?image=touchyawardax3.jpg
ok KambengJantan, i got it right now, dont i..puji la Pourpres tu lagi..fine. *Declaring war on U Pourpres!*
hey, lovely..thanks..got it posted on the right side of my blog already. smooch!
At least yours and ohnoaini's looked better than pourpres's. Got that extra ribbon pasted. I just user her's as the template for other awards. OOoops!! hehe.
Anybody else you think deserved an award please make a list. I'll review them personally. =)
KJ : i hope it's ok to shorten up ur name jadi KJ..sounds so much more macho, compare to KambengJantan..hehehe..
Other than those two, i'd say Acom's Place and Asian Mutt International. I do not know them personally like i know Pourpres and Ohnoaini but i very much think their blogs are cool. (",)
I'll go and check their blogs anytime soon.
anything is fine as long as your readers don't mistaken me as Khairi Jamaluddin. I'll ended up beaten to death before i can even type P
KJ : ok, put aside his political issues, he is just so handsome altho he has that typical malay dark look..wuhh..
this really touched me.. I am sorry that you had to go through all that pain.. I know how it feels to lose someone so dear to you.... I am glad that you have found some1 new and that doesn't mean that he will be forgotten... All the luck goes to you :)
Elaine : Thanks Elaine. There are times when i feel the guilt but it has been 2 years..I too never thought i'd fall in love again..have u ever lose anyone in your life before? Sorry to ask
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